50 Most Loathsome People in America, 2007

You can divide groups of people in many ways. The Blue/Red divide in the US in 2008 is probably going to ruin more friendships in the social media space than we know. But --- whatever -- when bored at parties, I like to slice and dice ... and I am not alone here, right?.. by asking "Who here thinks Paris Hilton, Mike Huckabee and Nicolas Sarkozy are not useless twits?" (Please, feel free to fill in your own celebrities). It's a fun party trick, because you can spontaneously create a half dozen or so equally loathsome groups trying sort themselves out. It's not the majesty of the Red Sea parting, but I ain't Moses, so...

But the Beast goes a step further: it lists the 50 Most Loathsome People in America, 2007.

This isn't a fun list. In fact, you are on it:

9. You

Charges: You believe in freedom of speech, until someone says something that offends you. You suddenly give a damn about border integrity, because the automated voice system at your pharmacy asked you to press 9 for Spanish. You cling to every scrap of bullshit you can find to support your ludicrous belief system, and reject all empirical evidence to the contrary. You know the difference between patriotism and nationalism -- it's nationalism when foreigners do it. You hate anyone who seems smarter than you. You care more about zygotes than actual people. You love to blame people for their misfortunes, even if it means screwing yourself over. You still think Republicans favor limited government. Your knowledge of politics and government are dwarfed by your concern for Britney Spears' children. You think buying Chinese goods stimulates our economy. You think you're going to get universal health care. You tolerate the phrase "enhanced interrogation techniques." You think the government is actually trying to improve education. You think watching CNN makes you smarter. You think two parties is enough. You can't spell. You think $9 trillion in debt is manageable. You believe in an afterlife for the sole reason that you don't want to die. You think lowering taxes raises revenue. You think the economy's doing well. You're an idiot.

Exhibit A: You couldn't get enough Anna Nicole Smith coverage.

Sentence: A gradual decline into abject poverty as you continue to vote against your own self-interest. Death by an easily treated disorder that your health insurance doesn't cover. You deserve it, chump.

The list will piss you off. But it's not a bad mirror to stare into.

Let me know what you think.

Via Pharyngula

Technorati : buffalobeast, pharyngula, riffraff

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 12:16am in Bizarre but Expected, In Defense of Elitism, People of Note | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (3) | TrackBack (1)

WikiBios: Recipe for libel, divorce, maiming & bitter recrimination

Here's a stupid idea to end all stupid ideas.

WikiBios believes, in complete denial of the human experience, "that everyone in the world, no matter who they are, has a unique and interesting story that deserves to be told." Now, I want you to think about this. Think of your 20 nearest and dearest. As much as you love them, how many of them have an "interesting story that deserves to be told" (to the rest of the world)? If you came up with even one, your friends are remarkable or you are deluded.

WikiBios, however, believes everyone deserves a story. So it offers a wikispace where anyone can start a biography about anyone else. Here's the catch: the subject of the biography cannot edit his or her own biography:

"While we appreciate that you want to tell the world about yourself, the unique part about this project is that it gives you the opportunity to find out what makes you special in the eyes of those who care about you. Therefore, we have one basic rule of our community that we ask you to abide by. While we encourage you to edit and create new biographies for your friends, we simply ask that you do not edit your own biography and instead allow those who care about you to write about you. Trust us, it's better this way. "

Better for whom? If my friend Lee Hopkins has urges-that-shall-not-be-mentioned (and I am not for a moment saying he does, but he's a handy example), and I find that a "unique and interesting story that deserves to be told," I'm encouraged to write his biography. That Lee might have an opinion about this unauthorized biography is apparently irrelevant.

Trust me... this stupid idea will last about as long as it takes the first attorney to pick up the phone

Technorati Tags: wikibios

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 09:03am in Bizarre & Unexpected, In Defense of Elitism, Is Tedious in the House?, Law | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (7)

Moleskine... You Write Smarter Stuff in one

Pricy, beautiful, functional ... so much that your heart breaks if you lose one.

Now there's a blog: Moleskinerie, a blog about the Moleskine, notebook of writers.

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 10:38am in Gadgets & Toys, In Defense of Elitism | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (1) | TrackBack (1)

Hugh McLeod & Ben Metcalfe Take the Gloves Off and Begin Thrashing One Another

It's got drama, fighting words, studied insults, and an audience baying for blood. It's the Hugh McLeod vs. Ben Metcalfe knock-down, drag out. And it's playing simultaneously at Ben's and at Hugh's.

As most of the free world probably already knows, Hugh is using his blog to promote Stormhoek Wine, just as he promotes  Thomas Mahon's bespoke suits. His belief that social media can be used to launch global microbrands has many observers and -- including Desirable Roasted Coffee -- more than a few believers.

Ben thinks Hugh's promotion of Stormhoek is unseemly, even distasteful. And said so, calling the wine "crappy" and Hugh's promotion of it "pimping". Hugh fired back with one of his trademark cards -- I never want to be a target of one of those -- and called Ben an apparatchnik of "socialist media". Yikes. Let the fur fly!

The spat has generated about 40 comments between the two sites. And while the boys are grudgingly making nice again, the core issue remains. Is it seemly to use blogs to market products (especially using free samples)? Is marketing in keeping with the spirit of social media.

I'm 100% with Hugh's principles on this: what on earth is wrong with marketing using one's status in the blogosphere? It may well backfire on Hugh one day, but I see little that is unseemly or unethical about trying it. And the other side of the argument -- that the blogosphere should be non-commercial -- is just plain silly.

But opinion seems sharply divided -- and I don't think this debate will die anytime soon. The discussion continues here and here.

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 05:03pm in Bizarre & Amusing, Blogging for Benjamins, Ethics, Food and Drink, In Defense of Elitism, Marketing | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (4) | TrackBack (1)

Blogger and Blogspot Do Not Exist for me Anymore

Blogspam -- fake blogs -- at Blogger and Blogspot has grown so rampant that one is reminded of kudzu.

From now on, Desirable Roasted Coffee will not link to blogs on free platforms.

Update: My ire was stoked when, after doing a Technorati search on a serious topic, I was directed to 3 blogs, all on Blogger, and all spam. As Lee and Stephen point out, refusing to link to Blogger blogs might be an overly-draconian measure. My point, of course, is that Blogger is becoming to blogs what Hotmail became years ago to email: the refuge of spammers.

Naturally, I am not going to delink the friends and colleagues who have Blogger blogs, but I am going to counsel them to move out of the slums. And, of course, I will link to Blogger blogs when there's reason to do so. But I will be seeing far fewer Blogger blogs, as I see no reason not to ignore them in search results

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 12:09am in Blogging, Blogging for Benjamins, In Defense of Elitism | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (8) | TrackBack (3)

Shel Holtz Slashes Pedants, Channels Henry Fowler

My usually good-natured friend Shel Holtz has pulled out the long knives on his blog & has proceeded to skewer those who believe blog and blogosphere to be barbarisms.

"Over the last two days, I’ve read probably a dozen posts on various blogs that complain about the words “blog” and “blogosphere.” Most of these turn their noses up, offering such disclaimers as “I refuse to use that stupid word ‘blogosphere.’”

Oh, please. Give it up. Blog, blogosphere, podcasting...they’ve all reached the plateau of common usage. This is what these things are called and all the whining and bitching in the world won’t change it."

In slaying pedants, he channels the great Henry Fowler, whose Modern English Usage should be required reading for anyone tasked with writing a press release.

"Barbarisms:  What after all is a barbarism? It is for the most part some word that, like its name, is apt to wound feelings -- the feelings, however, of much fewer persons. They will only be those who have not merely 'a profound convictions that there are such languages' as Greek and Latin, but a sufficient acquaintance with and love of those languages to be pained by outrages upon their methods of word formation. In this era of democracy it can hardly be expected that the susceptibilities of so small a minority should be preferred to the comfort of the millions, and it is easier for the former to dissemble their dislike of barbarism than for the latter to first find out what they are and then avoid them."

Shel goes on to ask What other words have entered the realm of common usage that you wish hadn’t but you use anyway?

Proactive springs instantly to mind, as does the phrase living document (we shot the last one for lack of proactivity). I'm sure I've been guilty of both, as much as I detest them.

But misuse of the word momentarily sends me around the bend. Every time a pilot announces "We'll be taking off momentarily, folks" I think "either he means it, in which case we are in trouble, or he's an ignorant ass who shouldn't be entrusted with an airplane."

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 06:23am in In Defense of Elitism, Logophilia, Writing & Grammar | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (8) | TrackBack (0)

Halley Suitt's Touching Request to Diversify the Blogosphere

I'm a white guy who writes in a blog, so I hope you will excuse me while I sit here and dominate the blogosphere. Yes, apparently that's what I (well, not me, but other white guys, those guys on the blogger A list) do, according to MSNBC's Steven Levy and blogger Halley Suitt.

Halley Suitt thinks it's time to fix that. Here's Halley's touching request -- that we all link to Ten New Voices (she means blogs; I had to look that up, too) this month:

"Here are the rules:

1.  They can't be male if they are white;

2.  You must have five women and five men;

3.  You must have at least three non-Americans.

Ironically, I think the toughest criterion to meet here will be NON-AMERICANS. We bloggers are very provincial in this respect."

It's the last paragraph that flummoxes me. There's nothing "ironic" in anything she says, but that's my silly pedantry.

But what's glaringly stupid is that she writes those lines in apparent ignorance of the hundreds of thousands of blogs written by "non-Americans" (whether she's being loose or tight with that definition does not change facts), yet remains smug in the belief that "we bloggers" are a close little group.

What she really means is "non Americans whose languages I understand".... otherwise, she has no way of checking.

Moreover, I'm good in her book if I link to them. That I praise them or roast them is of no interest. Just that I link. Sorry, Halley.... that's not quite on.

Halley... I link to great posts, bad posts, ignorant posts, posts that make me wish I'd dreamed of them, posts that are so instructive they should be seen no matter how badly they frighten the children.

Your post goes under "Bizarre but Expected" and "In Defense of Elitism".

Unfortunately, trackbacks are impossible, and "Post a Comment" seems to be disabled.

Via friend Gunnar Langemark.

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 01:13pm in Bizarre but Expected, Bloggers, Civil Liberty, In Defense of Elitism, Online Media, Society | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (5) | TrackBack (1)

Why We Speed Read Business Books

If you read real books and business books, you've noticed that most business books are unreadable. You might also have noticed that the bestselling business books are unreadable, but can be read in under two hours.

Why so fast? Because business bestsellers are written at a 7th grade reading level, according to Fast Company's recent analysis.

Link: Fast Company | No Consultant Left Behind.

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 11:25am in Books, In Defense of Elitism | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (0) | TrackBack (0)

Sub-literate Hackers Exploit AWStats Bug

Internetnews.com reports that vandals hacked and defaced 400 blogs over the past few days, using a bug in the AWStats program. Sub-literate hackers, I might add:

The defacement included a picture of a crying child with the caption, "This is my protest, this is my scream...you cannot close your eyes. The world have big problems and you wanna be more one?"

Does this remind anyone of those semi-intelligible & tiresome "communiqués" issued by the SLA, Panthers, IRA, ETA, RAF, et al? Do hackers and urban terrorists ever learn how to read and write?

Via Steve Rubel

Posted by Allan Jenkins at 10:43am in In Defense of Elitism, Online Media, Writing & Grammar | Permalink | Comments Welcome! (0) | TrackBack (1)